Friday, August 15, 2008

tiredness...

im extremely tired right now because of a few reasons:
1. my brother has pneumonia so im looking after him
2. my mom has a high fever so im making sure she gets sleep
3. i had to watch the baby all afternoon till dinner
4. i had to take care of things around the house because my
dad had to drive my brother around to the doctor and work

i thought they were pretty good reasons...

on a different note, im very excited because Kent is coming tomorrow! just for the day. then he comes again on Wednesday for a few days then leaves for Israel on the 24th. well my summer has been going pretty well. i was talking to someone the other day, possibly my mom, and saying how during August im usually very happy about going back to school and excited. this summer i wish would not end. as thrilled as i am about grade 12, there are a lot of unknowns for me at this point and its a little scary. i would rather just sleep all i want, see my sister during the day, work full time and just chill with my friends whenever. but thats not going to happen so im beginning to prepare myself for the journey i have ahead. luckily, there are quite a few of us who are starting grade 12 so a feeling of loneliness is out of the question. although i do feel like im the only one who has huge decisions to make before school starts in regards to my future and what im doing with my life. but there is a solution. well, i guess its more of a way to a solution, and thats giving it to God. thats all i can do at this point is let God handle my future. and for once, i really dont mind Him handling this one. growing up is scary.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

the "hamburgler"

Well yesterday i was at katelynn's house and we decided to go to Mc Donalds to get a happy meal. we walked in the door and there was four, 15 year old boys sitting at a table. one of them asked us to buy him a double cheeseburger. i said no and for him to stop talking to us. they all left and me and katelynn were left to eat in peace, but not for long. the one kid came up to our table and said hi ladies, then he grabbed katelynn's hamburger and ran. i thought he was going to come back but he didnt, he just kept running. well i was sorta mad so i ran out after him cause i had paid for katelynn. and katelynn was shocked and just sitting at the table. so then we got into my car and we chased him down. and he had eaten the cheeseburger. so i told him that he better pay us some money. he ran. we ran. into the park. i parked my car at katelynn's house. we lost them, then snuck up on them. as we were crouched behind some bushes some older guys we behind us, and looking very confused about why we were hiding in bushes. so i explained. and made us sound like complete stupid heads. i was like uh.. they uh stole her cheeseburger. and i pointed at katelynn. so then they decided to help us. so they went up to the group of guys and said that they were gunna call their friend named jack who had one eye and a hand gun. the younger guys looked a little frightened. but they proceeded to tell the older boys that they didnt steal katelynn's cheeseburger. then the 15 year olds  went off and found some girls to tell their adventures too. luckily the girls werent too impressed and ended up telling us where the one kid lived and his name. after calling and searching for an address, me and katelynn went to this kids house. wow were we ever embarassed. the house was a mansion, and we were asking for like 2 bucks to buy a cheeseburger. reluctantly we went to the door, already feeling bad because it was like 10:oopm. we explained to his parents the whole story and they got katelynn's number. just as i was leaving katelynn's house the mom called. she said the boy was home and that he would give her five bucks. so katelynn went over and got the five bucks. so yeah. thats the end of that. thats my story of my wonderful wednesday night. it made my summer. did it at least make your day?

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

summer days...

wow im feeling that summer boredom kicking in already, usually that starts in August for me. im starting to regret staying home all summer, no camp no anything. but there are a few things to look forward to i guess. Jerrid's 16th birthday party this Saturday, which is also when my stephie poo is coming home! also this weekend katelynn is spending at my house while her parents are out of town. and the last thing, which in my opinion is pretty exciting, is going to the Bes with Katelynn and Caitlin. thats next wednesday. and... so far.. thats my summer. pretty boring eh? one thought that i had was going out to Victoria to visit my grandparents, just for a few days, but i think that i might get a little bored. like its nice when someone comes with u, like my little brother for instance. but it would be me and the grandparents. i dunno, when i was little they could take my down to the beach and it was great. who knows, maybe ill go, maybe i wont. i just wish more people were around, dont get me wrong katelynn i have enjoyed hanging out with u for the past three days!!! haha. but i miss sooo many people *cough* steph! ahaha okay and maybe my little brother.. just a bit. and kent of course but im sorta used to him away for long periods of time but i might not be seeing him until like September which is pretty far away. oh well for now im not minding going on DQ runs and Walmart adventures with katelynn and kayla haha... what would i do without u guys? xoxo

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

SUMMER!!!!

i cant believe summer is finally here! this year has honestly been one of the worst years ever school wise, although my finals were incredibly easy so i shouldnt really complain. yay for report cards on friday. Ha i survived math B30 online! barely.. i think i got like a 66% in that class. oh well.. haha. im not planning to be an engineer or anything so its all good. well like i said on the one way girls blog im not doing anything for the summer. just working and such. cant believe that im going to England! its not going to hit me until im on the plane. unfortunately its costing me like $3,000 to go but it will definately be worth it. my dads verrry jealous haha. call me up or text me if ur bored! 

Sunday, June 01, 2008

mental break down #.. too many to count..

it seems like everytime i have a math test, i have a mental break down. like i am right now..
im rushing to hand in my assignments, i dont understand the material and i end up failing or doing really poorly on it. part of the reason is i dont understand the stuff but also im so busy with work. but i love work and i only work like 2 days a week. i cant quit my job..... i dont know what to do anymore about this stupid online math. its so stressful and i cant teach myself. theres been wayy too many late nights, too much crying and missing school. thats dumb.. its math.. it shouldnt have to be like that. ughh..

Saturday, May 10, 2008

...my friday night...

well last night i went to youth as usual. i was very excited because a professor from Briarcrest came in to talk to us about the bible and how to use it. also, the worship band was supposed to be playing a lottt of songs and we actually did a super good job! i couldnt believe how good we sounded. haha. anyways, at one point during the night, we went off in the church and we were given a few chapters out of the psalms to read. we havent really done much on our own lately at youth because we have been doing bible studies lead by a sponsor. but yeah so i went in the prayer room and read my bible, and put some worship music on my iPod. i realized how important it is for me to have quiet time. i dont do that very often. but yeah also, having someone from briarcrest talking about there experience there kinda made me think that i might want to go to bible college one day. im not saying for sure but its a possibility. i think it would be a really good experience and it sounds like a lot of fun. well. there are my random thoughts. haha hope u all had a good week and i shall see u all on Sunday!

Monday, May 05, 2008

one of those days

do u ever have one of those days where u feel like everything is wrong, but u cant think of what is wrong? like everything is stressing u out but ur not even that busy. like all u want to do is just sit in ur pjs and eat a bucket of ice cream? like u just want to listen to jack johnson? like u feel sorry for urself.. and then get mad for being selfish? like theres something in ur head that u cant get out and u just cant concentrate on anything? like nothing makes sense to u anymore?

well maybe u have never felt like this...

but for some reason i am today...

just one of those days i guess...

Friday, April 25, 2008

at home today

i decided that id rather be at home today stressing out about my piano performance rather than at school doing a math, chem and bio test. hmm.. all im doing is a whole bunch of math and popping sweet tarts in my mouth. they taste pretty good, but they sure are sugary. today at three im playing my toccata. and tomorrow afternoon im performing with ellen and then a waltz by chopin. ill just be glad when this is all over so i dont have to keep practicing piano 24/7, which has also gotten my fairly behind in my school work. which is another reason why im not going to school today. i havent even started studying yet, so i need the weekend to figure out whats going on in school. wow life has never been busier, im going back to work next week, then leaving for Ottawa!!! yay, then YC which i am sooo pumped about. Ottawa may be a bit boring but i hear its really pretty there so im definatly goin to take LOTS of pictures!. yay for moving making at youth on friday. i guess ill see you all there. hopefully u all will be there.. u better...lol xoxoxoxo

Monday, April 14, 2008

no titleee

hello everyone. well ive been busy lately but extremly happy! this is good. i have not been happy for a long time like this. things are going so good in my world. God has blessed me with amazing friends and family and i just cant thank him enough lately. i would really appreciate some prayer this week and next week because next Friday and Saturday i will be performing at the music festival for my piano. im doing 2 very difficult pieces and i really need the prayer because if i do well enough i could make it to provincials. just pray that God will calm these stupid nerves. i know im ready i just feel nervous for some reason. anyways i will be at youth Friday. but i guess i should get back to math. oh yay. fun.

Saturday, April 05, 2008

finally an update...

hello world. i figured i might as well post instead of just sitting at my computer staring at the screen. haha. well my egypt girls are back and im happy about that. although i never got my camel..lol. oh well they're much better than a camel... anyways. so last night i actually had so much fun! me, steph, landon (her bf), kayla, and her friend, kent, and caitlin all went to see P.S. i love you. oh it was such a cute movie! i liked it. not as much as i love the notebook. haha. yes the notebook is my favourite movie of all time. but yeah it was still pretty cute. i felt bad for the guys cause they had both seen it already and its a major chick flick but watever. haha. well today i think im going to do some major homework/studying for a math test and a bio quiz and a chem test which should be just enjoyable. and then tonight i get to work again. so its already a pretty full day! but i guess that means i should probably get going... haha i just wanted to let u know that im alive!! haha
<3

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

cant seem to focus...

im supposed to be doing math right now, and studying for a chem test... but i cant focus on anything.. im partly just really bored but also my mind is running a mile a minute...
im thinking about how much im gunna miss caitlin, katelynn and steph when they go to egypt... like i never really realized how much i love those three girls until they get taken away for 13 days... ahh.. well im sure ill find something to pass the time.. hopefully. ive been up till about 12:30 every night for a week. i dont know why... i just dont feel tired and its kinda of caught up with me. but when its like 10:30 ill be awake again. oh wellll... i guess i should start studying... <3

Sunday, March 16, 2008

music

i never really realized how important music is to me. ive been at one of those not so close points with God and i haven't been to church for quite awhile. its not that i havent been feeling like going, its just that i have been extremely busy. anyways, so today i was on my way to worship and i was actually really pumped for the practice for some reason. usually its just part of my weekly routine. so i get to the church and help mike pick out some songs for our package for the pancake breakfast on Friday (which you should all come to!) and yeah then practice started and we had to start with the hardest song first. and we played through it a couple of times and by the end we rocked at it. it was so much fun. i was so happy by the end of the practice. it made me happy that my music was worshiping God. He gave me the talent of being able to play the piano and i can use that to bring glory to him. i think thats so awesome. Worship music is so powerful and for me, it helps me feel so much closer to God. and thats just what i needed.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

regina

well ok.. i was on a blogging spree but i decided it had to stop somewhere.. haha i still blogged wayyyy more than any of u, but i guess that tells you how much of a life i have haha, soo im sitting in my hotel room in Regina (on a band trip), with my friend Dayle ahha and we are going to be so tired in the morning because it is now 1:30 in the morning and we have to get up by like 6 something.... well i had nothing better to do so i drank an energy drink not that long ago, which probably wasnt that smart...butt im not a very smart person...lol ahh well im having funn and im relaxed which never happens much anymore. listning to teardrops on my guitar, listning to dayle sing it lol while shes working on some sewing thinger ahaha... well so far regina has sucked to be honest, i hate only being able to eat fast food so i bought a HUGE bottle of water.. but so far all thats done for me is make me go pee like every 2 hours! why cant people be on msn at 1:30....lol well i guess theres school in the morning ahha. well i miss Destiny and im also very sorry that i haven't been going to church.... ive been soo busy its rediculous.. but i will be there next week. lol anyways i love you all! xoxoxoxoxox

Sunday, February 24, 2008

work


So today was my first shift at DQ. it was so much fun but an unbelievable amount of work. i worked an eight hour so im pretty tired. today wasnt too bad but my head feels like its going to explode with all the different information.. i learned about working the till to how to make blizzards and banana splits. but everyone was super nice to me and i think im really going to enjoy working there. plus its nice to know a lot of the people already, half of the people who work there go to my school. but i was basically on my feet the whole time. i really enjoy making all the different kinds of ice cream but you know the DQ swirl? (the little swirly thinger on top of your cone....) is so hard to do. i must have made over 100 things and it took me like such a long time to get the swirl right. lol no kidding. but anyways im tired so im going to bed. talk to you all later. school tomorrow.... yay.....

Saturday, February 23, 2008

random thoughts...

So don't be afraid; you are more valuable to him than a whole flock of sparrows. Matthew 10:31

so im feeling a bit alone right now. the whole day i have been feeling His presence off and on. One minute i feel like God is sitting right next to me, and then the next its like hes on the other side of the world. I know there is a battle for my heart. God wants me to follow him and be his child. His pathway might look difficult with twists and turns but at the end there are golden gates to his kingdom. The other path is well worn and appealing but at the end there is nothing, just emptiness. I have to decide which of these paths I will take. It seems that i have to make this decision daily.
I know that Gods path is the only one i want to travel. He is the one that actually cares about me. I am valuable to him. He is the one that will love me forever. He is enough for me. This is something ive been having to learn lately. Ever since i broke up with leon, ive had some flings with guys and the last one just ended. When i was little i always told myself that guys were stupid and I didnt need them. but now that im finally done with stupid and pointless relationships, I feel lonely at times because im used to looking forward to that phone call at night before i go to bed, or the hug randomly at school. But i realized that there is still something to look forward to. My father, God. I can go to bed tonight and feel his love surround me like the sheets in my bed. I look forward to talking to him until i fall asleep. (its better with God cause i dont have to use a phone that i could forget to hang up).
I know i went boy crazy for awhile. i dont like that. but God has forgiven me and im learning to forgive myself. and other people. All i want to focus on now is getting myself closer to Him. I want to let myself go and let him run all parts of my life, including my social life. I always fight to keep a tiny part of my life to myself but i realized that thats not going to work. I cant do this on my own. i cant be a control freek.
God is truely amazing. Thats all i can say.

just feeling like it....


well there arent many days when i actually feel like blogging... unfortunatly... but today i just want to, no reason at all. nothing really interesting is happening in my world so im not gunna lie, this post will probably be random and boring. well lets start off with my weekend. well its 5:00 on Saturday so i guess its not over.... anyways. i know that last night most of u were at Sams and i wish i was too i just never knew about it cause i wasnt on my computer at all yesterday.. well until midnight. but yeah so i went to Caitlin Scotts house and hing out with some buddies from SRC and then we went to Boston Pizza for supper.. i split nachos with Caitlin and Ben and had a chicken thai salad.. yummmmy! but i realized what a great deal nachos at Alexanders is. There like 9 bucks, they taste wayyy better and you get this huge over flowing plate of them. anywho, after that me, Caitlin, and our friends Dustin, Ryan, Joey and Matthew came over to Caitlins and they taught us how to play halo. haha wow.. im usually very opposed to these types of games but i acutally loved it.. although the boys mainly used my guy for target practice because i kept going out in the open. after halo we watched some tv and listened to Dustin sing on rockband.. haha. it was awesome. Matthew has a one month old daughter who is just adorable and i held her for a lot of the time. shes so tiny! and yeah then i went home at midnight and that concluded the 12 hour SRC marathon.. ahah it was a blast though.

After this im going to have to start the bio project i was supposed to be working on the whole break, but im procrastinating as usual. im doing it on creationism verses evolution. its a difficult argument to research on but its really interesting to see where both sides are coming from.... anyways..... i shall stop procarstinating more......... ohh facebook!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

getting better

okay so its been a few days. lifes getting better. well its still hard but whatever. im going to be okay. i realize that God definatly had a role in this. Like i thought for sure it would be me breaking up with him. But I know that I don't have the heart to do that so I probably wouldve been stuck in a pointless relationship if he hadn't done it. but moving on...
so this week has been good. theres always ups and downs but i have been getting in some nice relaxation time and stuff. so yeah oh and i saw step up 2 last night with my friend Aly and oh my word! it was soooo good!!! i love it. anyways.. oh and today i baked chocolate chip banana muffins.. yummmmyyyy.. but i should go for now.. just wanted to let you all know that im okay!!!

Sunday, February 17, 2008

breaking up


so joey phoned me not that long ago and he broke up with me.

normally you see this coming in a relationship, i didn't.

he told me he didnt have time for me and it "wasn't" me it was him.

he told me that he like being single, but if he ever had a girlfriend

i was perfect.

i guess i wasnt perfect enough.


i know God did not want me in this relationship because he tugged at my heart. other people wer constantly worried about me in a relationship with a non christian. i know this is what God wants me to do.


even though we went out for just under a month, i really liked him. a lot. and it hurts when someone you care about suddenly drops you and your heart shatters. it sucks. i don't really know what else to say. i dont want people to feel sorry for me. i got myself into this one and i guess joey got me out of it. but yeah. ill be fine. im just going to keep telling myself that.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

valentines day xoxo

so today is valentines day. sometimes its a good day for people, sometimes its a bad day. to tell you the truth i do not remember valentines day last year. well today was kinda just like any other day for me. i would have done something special with joey but he left today for regina for a hockey tournament for four days. he had only and hour to spend with me after school till he had to be home. we were going to try to go have lunch where he works (avacados on 8th street) but obviously an hour isnt enough time to do just that. so we went to DQ accross the street from school and had a romantic date and he bought me a blizzard. okay so it wasnt so romantic but he did sit next to me after i stupidly ordered a blizzard in -50 weather and i started to shake (and having little "katelynn" seizures). then we had a romantic drive back to his house with my brother in the back seat talking to him about tires and cars and racing cars. i stopped following the convorsation after they said drag racing. oh well. i personally think valentines day is over rated and im not being bitter because i didn't do anything particularly special. its a "hallmark" holiday.
what i think valentines day is, is a day to celebrate true love. not boyfriend girlfriend highschool love, because you never know when that can end. but the only true love we have. the love of Jesus. Seriously, I know most of you hear this all the time but God loves us so much. There is nothing like his unconditional love. sometimes we take this love for granted. ok maybe we take it for granted a lot. i know i do. but when you think about it, its like having to give up your son, or your daughter, a loved one, a sibling or a friend and watching them die and suffer in one of the most painful ways possible. honestly i don't think there is one person who can handle that. only God has that much strength and love for us. He loves us so much that he put something so perfect and so remarkable on a cross to be torured for us sinners who really don't deserve it. that kind of love will never be matched. not by any boyfriends or girlfriends, or even our parents. nothing can match the love of God.
on a happier note. im pumped for tomorrow at youth and i can't wait to see you guys! and to eat chocolate. i shall see you guys later. love you all!
happy valentine's day.
xoxox

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

whats been happening...

well not much.. lol the past few weeks have been a blur really. with school starting, friends, boyfriends, piano, homework.... life is busy. but i have been managing to stay close with God which is reasuring. life seems to be going really well. im really happy and i love all my friends and i love God. everything seems to be just the best its every been. but part of me is fearful...
sometimes i think that this feeling isnt going to last and im just waiting for the day that something is going to go wrong.. like this weekend. i haven't felt so hopeless in a long time. my parents were constantly talking to me about my life (and i don't blame them), i was grounded on Saturday, and everything seemed to be crumbling around me. when this happens i usually go to God and ask him to help me get through it. and i did, but sometimes its nice to have someone to physically talk to (aka a friend). When things are going bad i turn to one person usually.. leon. as most of u know, hes been gone since last week and will be gone for 6 weeks or something up north. i know that leon and i have had our fights and whatnot and i knew that i needed a break from seeing him and stuff. but as soon as he left, i needed him.. and thats the first time he hasn't been there. i got this pain in my cheast like when we broke up and i realized how upset i was that my best friend was gone. i felt lonely. i guess its just weird not having him around cause hes always around. hes always there ready to answer my phone calls when im sobbing on the other end telling him how life sucks..(it doesn't tho..lol) well i guess u never know what you have until its gone..

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

semester 2

well im at school right now on my spare... pretty boring. i had chemistry first (yay) and i was supposed to be in a class with katelynn and steph and kayla and caitlin buttttt... i got shafted into a different class. oh well.. im sure ill last. next period i have biology which should be lovely.. and then history and psychology. im so pumped for psychology!!! theres not much to say but its really cold outside.... like -50.. honestly they need to cancel school... lol well i guess im done..<3

Sunday, January 27, 2008

worship..

well i just got back from the amazing retreat.. im not gunna tell you all about it just cause most of u were there and theres no point in having you read about what you did... haha but the one thing i do want to talk about is worship. like okay, before the retreat the team worked really hard to get our songs ready. even though we had practiced so much i was still pretty scared. but when we played it was so amaxing like it was so cool. im not trying to brag, its not even that we sounded good it was the mood and feeling. everything was so happy. like i bet in all the pics of me playing keyboard i have this huge goofy grin on my face. and honestly i don't think i have ever felt more at peace and happy ever before. i am so glad that God told me to go on this retreat, so much stuff was said and it was truley a blessing to come and be with all of you.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

an answered prayer

so most of you know that ive been kinda struggling with not going to the retreat. im supposed to be going to this high school select wind orchestra which always conflicts with the winter retreat. i believe that i missed it last year because of this. anyways im the type of person who wants to be involved in evertyhing and i don't want to miss out. so i prayed to God that he would show me what i need to do. Part of me wanted to stay home because to be honest, i don't mind these band things. But the other part of me was like, you know ive been working my butt of and i want to have a nice weekend with my friends and God is going to be working in that place. So last night in small groups, this subject was prayed upon. I thought nothing of it afterwards. This morning i woke up and my mom was in the kitchen and i was like mom guess what, and shes like no you guess what. and so i waited her to tell me what she needed to say, and she said Grace, you are going on the retreat. weirdly enough that was just the thing i was about to tell her. my dad heard all this and he was just confused... but yeah so im going to be going on the retreat becasue God wants me to be there. oh and by the way, any rumour you heard about my mom coming is totally not true...lol

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

things are finally good...

okay so the past few weeks, particularly the past week, has been a rough one. this week ive been trying something new. im the type of person that gets really stressed out becasue of finals. what better way to not be stressed out by doing some good ol devos. God definatly had this one planned out. The past few nights he has shown me so many amazing verses its crazy. and ive been writing in my prayer journal everyday. God has been so close to me lately but i hope that doesn't go away. I was losing hope there for a little bit but He showed me all of the amazing things He has done for me in the past and i knew that i just had to believe and trust in Him again. by doing this, God can work through me to help my friends and people in my life in ways that i could never imagine.
anyways, im at school right now. its second so i have my spare right now.. school is absolutely insane right now but hopefully everything will calm down after finals. but i guess ill go for now. thanks for praying for me guys, it definatly helped! love you all...
xoxoxox

Sunday, January 13, 2008

prayer?

hey guys. im having a bit of a rough day. okay make that a lot of a rough day. can u guys please pray for me? im sorry but i can't tell you whats going on but ill be okay. just pray for me that God would give me strength. thanks

Saturday, January 12, 2008

mmmm...its good to be back


so last night i went to youth. it was sorta a "new start" cause we are starting a new bible study. I am in Candace's group and i absolutely love it! i got put with some lovely girls (and my enji!!!) and i know that God put us in a group for a reason.

lately, i have been having that feeling where i want to be close to God but i just can't get there. no matter how hard i try, i just wasn't feeling him. so finally last week, God spoke to me. There is a friend of mine who is having some trouble and ive been really worried about them. God showed me a person at our church who could help my friend. I knew that God was talking to me because after church my mom told me that she felt the same thing.

God is so amazing guys. i know that he loves all of us.

God please help us all through these tough and stressful weeks of finals. i pray that you would help us to keep focused on our studies and help us to remember all the information that we learned. Take all of our nervousness away and please help us to feel your presence.

amen...